Monday, July 26, 2010

More on Molly

A while ago on Facebook you were supposed to write up "25 things about...". I did one for Molly way back then, and just reread it the other day. It made us laugh, so I decided to share it. I think it is pretty accurate, actually.

25 Things About Molly Sheriff

1.     I am bossy.
2.     I often “toot” my way up the stairs.
3.     I am capable of giving people the “dirty eye”. Those who have been on the receiving end know what this means.
4.     I hate black dogs, and always have. I always will.
5.     I love mint, especially Misty Mints. I have been known to dig through knapsacks and damage Palms in order to access minty gum.
6.     I have had several things stuck to my paws. Examples include but are not limited to:  a pistachio shell which fit perfectly over a pad, and a butterscotch candy, which I continued to lick even while it was stuck.
7.     I cannot gain weight.
8.     When Vikki was here, I stole her bones and ran downstairs with them, because she was afraid to come down.
9.     I am afraid of toasters, fireworks, cap guns, and road hockey.
10   I am afraid of bunnies, although I will stalk them. I expect them to run before I get near.
11   I am a standard poodle. I was bred to retrieve from the water. However, I hate water, and am not much for retrieving.
12   When I was young I loved dogs and didn’t like people. Now that I am old, I don’t like dogs and love people. I am offended if people I see on the street do not pat me.
13   The neighbourhood children love me, run to see me, and give me pats. That is how it should be.
14   I have fallen off beds on more than one occasion, and have been trapped under a bed once, requiring John to lift it off me.
15   I once found a very small dog toy on the street during a walk. I carried it home, and still have it.
16   On one occasion I fought a dog in the dog park in Toronto. I was actually winning, had him pinned and was going for his throat by the time Rich pulled me off him. I hated that dog.
17   I once had a dog of my own, called Avro. Only I was allowed to play with him in the park. If Rich dropped his leash, I would pick it up and walk him. I am very responsible about these things.
18   I ran away from my dog walker in Toronto twice. It wasn’t fun, and I don’t recommend it to others. My pads were bleeding by the time I was found. I couldn’t help it though. It thundered, and I bolted in fear.
19   I call doggy day care Torture Camp, even though I secretly like hanging out with the people there. I could do without the dogs though.
20   I once kept Constance up for 3 days straight. Of course, I was dying at the time, so it only seems fair.
21   Although I don’t like to admit it, I like playing with the puppies that we foster. I just wish they wouldn’t bite me so much.
22   I have possibly the worst dog breath on the planet. I think it’s because I’m rotting from the inside out. Not really my fault.
23   I love to chase chipmunks. I once launched myself through a screened porch, dropped 3 feet to the ground, and without a moment’s hesitation, chased it into the woods.
24   I love cats, and would like to take Chewy home with me.
25   I like people and dogs to think I’m tough, but deep down I’m a Nervous Nelly.

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